Diary Entries
(14 years old)
December 24, 1800
Boarding School
To my derelict self,
‘Twas Christmas Eve, and I lay within the solemn refuge of my cold room. The wintertime frost has long coated the bare, snowy yard, where the naked oaks stand grim and isolated. Beneath the creaky floorboards, the joyful laughter of my classmates echoes as they prepare to face the harsh frost outside. Father’s letter arrived today, commanding that I remain here again for the holiday. I feel a bitter disappointment, yet it was expected. Father always insists that I must become a man, and to be a man, one must embrace full independence.
Henceforth, I indulge myself in bitter tea and my well-liked volume of The Arabian Nights, my only faithful companions, per usual, during Christmas. Though the tales are entertaining, I must admit that after five prolonged years here, literary treasures can only sustain a lonely heart for a fleeting hour. I have come to realize that people inevitably abandon you when you foolishly depend upon them. Books, however, stay safely bound upon the dusty shelves they lie on. Thus, I shall keep my own private account of thoughts and seek comfort only in my solitary endeavors from now on.
Resigned in solitude, Ebenezer
(16 years old)
December 23, 1802
Meeting Father and Fan
To my derelict self,
Dear Fan arrived today in a gilded carriage. I could not express my growing joy as I saw her, her cheeks blooming like red winter roses, contrasting with the pale snow. She whispered that Father is changed, a transformed man, much gentler now, in fact, and that I am to return home for good. As I received this news, my heart leapt at the thought of a long-forgotten and forbidden hope, yet when we met Father’s cold gaze at the doorway, I felt that the biting chill in his manor rivaled the sharp frost outside. I entered, and his words were few. I knew from then that he looked upon me not as a son, his son, but as an expensive debt ultimately settled. On this day, I push back any sinking emotions, and accept that human affection is too fragile and precarious a bargain, as a slight mood can shatter it thoroughly. I must seek a security that is unwavering.
Resigned in solitude, Ebenezer
(18 years old)
December 22, 1804
Parting Beloved Fan
To my derelict self,
The winter air and ceaseless snow feel painfully bitter this night, matching the terror that weighs upon my heart. Dear Fan lies in her silent chamber, faltering with an insidious fever that the doctors cannot mend. Watching her weak breath heave, my heart aches with a terrifying dread. Even a single thread of human affection is a liability, as it can be broken easily by illness and misfortune.
Fan was my sole connection to warmth in this merciless world. Now that she is being taken from me, I realise that poverty is what leaves us defenseless against perishing. Had we a vast fortune, we could have summoned the finest physicians and golden remedies to spare her of this agony. Love alone cannot heal a waning body, but gold possesses the capacity to save it. Without wealth, we are entirely helpless against such pitiful suffering.
Resigned in solitude, Ebenezer
(20 years old)
December 21, 1806
Master Fezziwig
To my derelict self,
Master Fezziwig’s warehouse roars wildly with bright lanterns, spirits, and merry laughter tonight, yet I spent hours crouching over ledgers until my fingers cramped. Fezziwig foolishly insists business is a joyous and intimate trade, but that is only because he does not understand that beyond his heavy wooden doors lies a cruel, calculating world. In daily life, men with goodwill are forced and burdened to ruined futures by a single unpaid penny. Joy is simply a precarious distraction that invites careless ruin and failure. My past few years of labor have brought me to discover that wealth is the only armor against such wretched misery. Gold never starves, nor does it betray its master. This shall be my last entry, as I must commit myself relentlessly to grasp this trade.
Resigned in solitude, Ebenezer
Rationale:
The purpose of my diary entries is to demonstrate how Ebenezer Scrooge is not born with cold, calculating, and isolated characteristics, but is rather shaped by the recurrent childhood trauma, family abandonment, and fear of poverty he faced. In order to portray this, I utilized a diary format to reveal Scrooge’s private, unfiltered thoughts. In addition, I chose the diary format because private journals are often more intimate and raw compared to other literary formats that can be viewed by the public eye. As a result, the diaries act as a vulnerable outlet for Scrooge to convey the raw emotions that he would not express aloud, such as when he bitterly reflects that “Without wealth, we are entirely helpless against such pitiful suffering” in his third entry. In relation to Scrooge’s character, the diary entries feel more realistic considering his isolated nature throughout both his childhood and adulthood, which therefore reinforces the idea that he consistently remains in a solitary atmosphere.
Moreover, I selected four specific experiences to illustrate in Scrooge’s diary entries as each represents a stage in his life that progressively diminishes his emotional wellbeing, connection, and trust. First, his early abandonment at boarding school during Christmas establishes that he is regularly isolated from others, especially his family. Then, his tense reunion with his father forces him to push away any forbidden hopes of family affection. Following this, Fan’s illness and tragic death intensify his fear of mortality and poverty. Finally, his apprenticeship under Fezziwig depicts the moment he becomes attached to the idea of wealth as the sole dependable form of protection and survival.
Furthermore, to reflect his age, background, and emotional condition, I made Scrooge’s voice more formal, introspective, and increasingly analytical. As Scrooge gains education and work experience, his tone shifts from distress and fear into calculating and distant, projected in his later entries when he is older, including “wretched misery,” “merciless,” “liability,” and “entirely helpless.” I also used terms related to his apprenticeship in entry four, such as “crouching over ledgers,” to realistically portray his shifting and maturing mindset. This establishes that he has grown more emotionally distant, where his desire for control is growing, foreshadowing his straightforward and cold personality in the novella.
Additionally, I incorporated literary and stylistic devices to reinforce Scrooge’s future transformation. For instance, I utilized personification when writing that “gold never starves, nor does it betray its master” in my fourth entry to emphasize his distorted mindset. He compares gold, as a living being, to people, where he reflects that it is much more reliable compared to humans, who have, in his memories, repeatedly hurt and abandoned him. Scrooge’s belief that gold is far more dependable than human loyalty and affection proves that because of his experiences, he is becoming more isolated and no longer trusts others. Stylistically, I used repetition in the literary structure of each entry by opening with “To my derelict self” and closing with “Resigned in solitude, Ebenezer.” Within each entry, I consistently began with a descriptive setting, transitioned into his emotional pain, and concluded with a resolute final statement that becomes progressively more bitter with each entry. This recurring format makes it easier to identify change in his tone and personality. Ultimately, these experiences built up and altered his behaviour, which led to his future character in adulthood.